Your Surrey Wedding - October/November 2024 (Issue 109)

Tips and advice from local experts PRE-NUPS THE LOWDOWN Joanna Farrands, family lawyer and partner at Moore Barlow, says, “As a divorce lawyer, I frequently help couples with prenuptial agreements, which are becoming increasingly popular. Though sometimes seen as unromantic, a prenup is a practical step that can strengthen your relationship by encouraging important conversations early. What is a prenuptial agreement? A prenuptial agreement is a legal document outlining how your assets will be divided if the marriage ends. We always start the prenup by expressing the couple’s intent for a long, happy marriage while acknowledging the practicality of discussing finances upfront. Prenups can be particularly important if there’s family wealth, a business, or if it’s a subsequent marriage with existing assets. To ensure fairness, a prenup must also consider your partner’s needs, including housing. Without a prenup, assets could be split 50/50, even if one partner invested more in certain assets for example the family home. Why consider a prenup? Discussing finances, future goals, and whether you both want children before marriage provides a strong foundation for your relationship. Many divorces stem from disagreements on issues that could’ve been addressed earlier, like whether the couple want children or not. I’ve seen many couples divorce because they didn’t discuss their hopes for children at the beginning, and it becomes a deal breaker five or even ten years in. Open conversations can prevent future unhappiness or breakups. What to do if you want a prenup? If you or your partner want a prenup, consult a lawyer at least six months before the wedding. The agreement should be signed at least 28 days before the wedding, and both parties need independent legal advice. In more complex cases, mediation or collaborative law involving both parties and your lawyers can help reach an amicable agreement. I have helped plenty of couples with prenuptial agreements, and then I’ve never seen them again because they are very happily married. But for those I do see again because they decide to divorce, it’s worth noting that the prenup they had in place saved them time, money and additional emotional turmoil. Jan Galloway, divorce coach at Coaching for Clarity (www. coachingforclarity.uk), adds: “My advice to couples getting married is, first and foremost, to have open and honest communication. Many clients seek help to manage difficult conversations with their partners and to work on how they make themselves heard, stating that the relationship broke down because they could no longer communicate. “Discuss your respective values with your partner. Shared values are the cornerstone of a strong relationship and will help you build that bond, enabling you to face all that a life together or as a family brings. “Coming together as a couple is very important, but being loyal to who you are allows you to individually flourish in your marriage. Be tolerant of each other’s differences as that is what makes you each unique and no doubt was part of the attraction in the first place! “Finally, approach marriage with a sense of humour. As they say, couples who can laugh together in moments of adversity stay together!” Contact: 023 8071 8000 www.moorebarlow.com HOT TOPIC 60

RkJQdWJsaXNoZXIy MTA0NTE=